Online chastity and self locking discussion

Without someone to tell you when you’ve earned it or they want you to do it, how do you know when you’ve truly earned it? If it is simply a matter of deciding that after enough time passes you have earned it, how is that any different than just wanting it but delaying it? Can you earn it on your own? I know a lot of people put it in the hands of chance and/or strangers, but that doesn’t seem particularly meaningful to me. If I could set measurable goals, that would be nice, but I can’t think of any. I don’t need to lose weight. I have nothing in particular to save up for. What else is there?