- Posts
- 3
- Joined
- Jan 1970
@HollyC pointed out in our chat that if we agree men should be released whenever they grow weary of being locked up, then male chastity essentially becomes just another kinky pastime for them.
Click to expand… That made me think: “Hot!” But I also wondered: “Isn’t it really?” Let me break it down. Most guys here seem to enjoy the restraint; I certainly do. So yes, for me, it is a fun kinky game. It seems most of us feel the same way. However, Holly’s comment felt hot because it suggested that I might not be entirely in charge. Her reasoning implied she has her own reasons for keeping him confined, which don’t always perfectly match what he wants. In another thread, @TheKeyholderWife noted: He understands that if he “really wanted out,” I would let him go because it is his body after all and he isn’t a slave. I believe this reflects the reality for many of us. We are practicing negotiated non-consensuality. Yet there are various levels to this dynamic. Some guys must actively work to keep their Keyholder interested in dominating them. Others have partners with a strong agenda for chastity, while some women would end the relationship if he tries to defy it. Where do you stand and how did you arrive at your situation? Let me share my story first. M and I have been together for two years. I introduced her to kinky play, and she has embraced it well. It took her a bit of time to figure out what works best for her personally, but she discovered that she truly enjoys teasing me. I got pierced last January, though the healing process is slow; I expect to be securely caged by September. M says she is eager for this level of control and has become stricter about denying my stimulation. I feel a mix of fear and excitement. We have a safe word established, so re-negotiation is possible if needed. It isn’t impossible for me to get out. However, M doesn’t believe that will happen because this fits how my sexuality naturally works, which she is likely correct about. What remains unclear to me is what would occur if I used the “Safeword: I need to climax more often and feel penetration more frequently.” Would she agree? Or might she reply, “Nope. Either I control that or I don’t; you have no say in it.” Currently, I think she might negotiate, but six months from now, perhaps not. Still, this is what I desire. And if my needs change significantly enough to alter that want, I believe we would re-negotiate.