Introductions discussion

Greetings from Cheshire, UK. I am a married man of 47. We are both very experimental in our sex lives and have explored the femdom dynamic since I revealed to my wife that I cross-dress, about six months into our marriage. One night after work, she handed me a PVC maid uniform along with a Curve chastity cage. That event was sixteen years ago. Since then, my style has shifted from stereotypical satin blouses and pencil skirts with 5” heels or the maid outfit (though I do own three of them) to more fashionable attire, often skinny jeans and flats, just acting as a regular housewife rather than a sissy maid. Even though life keeps me from dressing full-time, it is evident that I lean closer to being transgender than transvestite. It has nearly caused breakups, but after stopping and selling everything to rebuild my wardrobe, she admitted she hates the look yet uses it against me in arguments to justify her behavior, and also confessed she actually likes seeing me en femme. The chastity device has been a constant presence on and off. The Curve was quite large; too big for comfort, forcing me to use the tightest rings to keep my small, compact testicles from slipping out, which caused rubbing and chafing. That marked the end of that particular adventure until the urge returned. I purchased other devices: Birdlocks, a Holy Trainer, CB6000s, and various metal ones found on eBay. They all sit in a box under our bed now. The CB is my favorite. Our attitudes fluctuate; sometimes she loves T&D, while at other times (like recently), she loses interest—the cage stays on, period. I am fine with this because my fantasy is to never be allowed release again. I believe this stems from my gender conflicts, a bit of self-analysis there… The keys are currently resting next to the bed in a plastic key safe container. I bought it for practicing self bondage since she gets hot and cold about our kink; when I have free time, I handle it myself rather than asking her or waiting for her to initiate play. I put the cage on last Wednesday (making this day 5), locked the keys away set for three days, then said nothing. On Friday while making dinner she noticed the safe was locked, came in, reached for my cage, and smiled. It opened Saturday afternoon, but the keys are still inside. I think our longevity comes from not pushing our kinks or personalities too hard; some self-service helps, like that self bondage. I haven’t brought up permanent chastity with her yet, but it is a conversation on the horizon again. We have discussed it before, though activities like cycling and indoor climbing usually mean removing the cage. Now, however, I feel ready to fit my life around being caged rather than adjusting my caging around my life. In the meantime, the keys are in the safe, which I re-locked about 20 minutes ago for another three days, prompting me to post this. It is a long read; I guess I just needed to get it all out there. Thank you