Shower Denial with Numbing Cream

Fairly new to chastity. At least for periods longer than a day or 2. I’m on week 2 of lock down with no cumming and only temporary releases for cleaning. Just wanted to share what I found to be frustrating in my new journey of chastity. Currently I’m in a cheap steel China made eBay cage, and surprisingly it’s comfortable enough to stay locked days at a time, but getting a good cleaning has been a challenge with the cage on in the shower. My KH would normally supervise me while I’m unlocked to get a good deep clean every few days. But as I’m unlocked and scrubbing myself down there, I become aroused from finally feeling “attention” to my manhood. I feel like I was cheating from the pleasure I’d get from just washing and scrubbing. And I felt like that wasn’t fair for my KH even though she’d supervise most of my showers. So I suggested that when she unlocks me for a shower that she rubs numbing cream on me before I’m able to touch myself to clean. By time I get in the shower, the cream has numbed me enough that I can barely feel anything at all and couldn’t pleasure myself if I wanted to! I follow her rules of no playing with myself in the shower, and wouldn’t go behind her back anyways. But with the cream, I don’t even get to feel the washing and scrubbing. By time the cream wears off, I’m back in my cage locked up again without feeling any pleasure during my temporary release! I found it crazy frustrating to not be able to feel anything while I’m unlocked, but couldn’t be more turned on by the denial! In the meantime, I just put an order in for a MM jail bird in hopes of a more comfortable fit, and easier cleaning. Maybe once it arrives I may not even need to be released for a good deep cleaning! At least I can only hope 😁 And if I do need a release, I guess it’s back to the numbing cream. Gosh do I love being locked for her and hope she keeps me this way ❤