Performance Anxiety and Advance Notice for Orgasm

My wife and I are relatively new to chastity play. We aren’t planning anything long-term; it’s just part of our training and discipline routine. I’ve noticed that when she gives me advance notice about whether I can orgasm, or even hints there’s a good chance I will, I sometimes struggle with performance issues because of the pressure to perform on command that night. On days where I’m certain I won’t be forced to cum, my erections come faster and firmer without much thought needed. The lack of pressure really helps. Another issue is that occasionally when she wants me to orgasm, I just don’t feel horny at all. It’s not anxiety; it’s simply a lack of desire.:)

Three questions:

1. Do you get advance notice about potential orgasms?
2. Does performance anxiety bother you, and is it common for others too?
3. Have you ever been aroused while in chastity but found yourself completely uninterested when your key holder decided you should orgasm?