Persuading My Wife to Take Charge

So, I suspect this is another “I answer this once a day” type of questions, but… How can I get my wife more interested? OK, it’s not that general a question, so here’s the backgtound: I’m currently locked and my wife has the key but isn’t actively engaged. BUT, she has gotten used to the idea, but doesn’t understand why I would want this. We’ve discussed it a lot, and unfortunately I can’t explain it well, other than to tell her I would like her to take control of my sex life, and maybe more. Now, she has zero interest in sex in general, and doesn’t want a submissive husband, so what’s the sell to her? She is willing to work in her sex drive, and has spoken with a doctor and is willing to try some stuff she wasn’t before, we used a penis extension with decent results, and we’re waiting on a “magic wand”, so she’s clearly willing to expand her horizons. So, I mentioned that there was a book written for “vanilla wives” and she’s willing to read it, but… Should I get her the Lucy Fairbourne book, or the Sarah Jameson book, or are both a bad idea, and why?