Gowther Going Solo for the Moment

I am unsure if I ever imagined myself here (in chastity or blogging on a chastity site), but here I am and I look forward to it greatly. I wasn’t entirely certain how the concept of male chastity would appeal to me, but that happened not long after the pandemic began. I was captivated immediately. I have always liked bondage and being restrained, so keeping my genitals confined felt very attractive. Without doing enough research, I purchased a metal one that seemed suitable. It soon became clear it was way too big. Since then, I bought a smaller model. It fits much better now, though I think there might be an even better fit out there. It is quite comfortable during the day, but at night I often wake up with a full erection and the ring pulling terribly on my testicles. For a while, I couldn’t sleep in it all night, but lately, I have managed about two consecutive nights before giving up. Using petroleum jelly helps keep things loose, which seems to work. I really like metal cages. I love how they look and enjoy the feel of them. The plastic or silicone ones don’t appeal to me at all. I am using a 45cm ring. Rings that are 50cm are way too big (I can pull out completely), while the 40cm ones are currently too tight for my liking. I have done proper research and understand what I need to do if I decide to buy a third one. The idea of a custom cage appeals to me, but the thought of paying $200-$300 gives me pause, and I haven’t even mentioned it to Mrs. Speaking of Mrs., she definitely thinks I am weird and doesn’t understand why I would want to do this kind of thing. I have presented the keyholder idea to her, but she says there is too much going on for her right now (we have two young kids). She isn’t actively interested, but as she said, “Whatever floats your boat.” So she is fine with me doing it on my own. I do find that it has been helpful. When the urge comes around, my mind goes straight to her. Even though I have access to the key, I haven’t used it unless to take off due to pain. I really want to wear this permanently, whether Mrs. is into it or not.