Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

Folks, I am an adult male in my younger middle years who, much like many of my Gen X peers, has developed issues with pornography and his sexuality. As you can see from the username I chose upon joining, I lean heavily toward being submissive and have found a comfortable place within the Sissy Culture. That said, I don’t want to appear odd when I reach 50… Playing these games while young is fine because you generally have time on your side; however, as you age, sex becomes less of an immediate concern and more about desiring a partner beyond just physical intercourse… Furthermore, having consumed SO MUCH porn over the past two decades, I have numbed myself to genuine intimacy, making it truly difficult to reach orgasm naturally within a reasonable timeframe with a companion. I don’t believe I can restrict my interest in this area since much of it resonates directly with me. I am not sure if I am unusual—in fact, I know I AM odd—but I wish to steer my path toward a healthy, albeit kinky, relationship with a woman. Very few women want to tolerate a male partner whose legs are likely smoother than theirs and who spends FAR more time painting his fingernails and toenails than they do. Granted those nails rarely venture outside the house, yet I see signs of Sissy Feminization on my horizon and have noticed them for 6-9 months now. I attempted to step back, but it undermined my physical health routine which is almost entirely linked with the Sissy lifestyle… What I want to ask is if you doubt I can resist looking away, how about a trusted trainer sending her key by mail to a female friend, along with an emergency spare secured in a breakaway lockbox? This would remove my ability to masturbate and might help me focus on things other than internet sex and hypnosis… If I were 20 instead of 40, I would probably go that route completely, but at this age, such behavior just looks strange. Some of these men embarrass me greatly… Please don’t mistake my question for a declaration. I am leaving the decision to you, humbly looking down. This is NOT a rant but a query. Am I tricking myself into thinking I can starve my Sissy Side until it fades away? Thank you very much… Matthew.